I have a HP Pavillion DV9009nr.  Specs below:

Mobile DualCore AMD Turion 64 X2 TL-52, 1600 MHz (8 x 200)
nVidia GeForce Go 6150, AMD Hammer
2 slots of ram with 1G in each. 
I'm running Vista 32 Bit
BIOS Type - Phoenix (12/18/06)
Video Adapter NVIDIA GeForce GO 6150 (64 MB)
Bios version F.25
Mobo Props - Quanta 30B9 65.26
Processor
Now running at 67 Degrees, was over 90 degrees last night (celsius)
Run second monitor, and run some heavier programs (ACT, QuickBooks, Outlook, etc.) all at the same time.

My Questions:

Been researching how to upgrade the ramt o 4G, and everyone at HP is telling me you can't do it.  But does not seem legitimate.  I found some people that have said through forums that when I upgrade the Bios, I should be able to at least get 3G of Ram. 

Here is a link to a forum I found on exactly this.  This guy's computer is almost identical to mine.  Only difference is out Bios.  His is F.3D.  Mine is F.25, and the current version is F.42.  However, if you go to the HP website, it tells many users not to run the F.3D Bios. (but my PN does not match the one they talk about)

http://forum.notebookreview.com/showthread.php?t=347808

I have orderd the exact RAM he has and got it pretty cheap. (4G (2x2) for $30)

Questions.

1)  Should I update the BIOS?

If I should, how to do easily back up my BIOS in case something goes wrong, and if something does go wrong, what are my next steps.
I would also have to do much research into how to update the BIOS.   I've never done it before and am a touch nervous to do it.

2)  If I do update my BIOS, what version?  Should I update to the F.3D or the F.42?

3)  My bandwith is running very low.  Any typical programs I should shut down to increase it?

4)  My computer is running hot...very hot.  Will the BIOS upgrade help this?

5) Very random question...  I have my secondary monitor running into the docking port of the computer/  Because of that the secondary monitor output is free.  Shouldn't I be able to put another monitor into that slot, and be able to use a third???

Any help anyone can provide would be great.